The Episodes

Let's watch some mor...ack!...Cycle 4

Overview: Crichton plays with an Irish Setter, a Pit Bull, and the local Klingon pirate-miners.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy (with his new face hugging tribble) becomes a Leviathan homecare specialist, a vitner, a DRD music conductor, authors 'Wormholes for Dummies' on some spare crates, enjoys Baywatch with Harvey and psuedo-Spacebabe, bonds with PilotTheresa, becomes an English as a Second Language instructor, becomes the local animal control officer (with the help of DRD Napolean starring as DRD 1812), makes friends with IrishSettergirl, helps form the first Intergalactic Leviathan Rapelling Team with Gothkitty and IrishSettergirl, and explains Klingon Diplmacy. IrishSettergirl screws up Monkeyboy's 'Wormholes for Dummies', triple crosses the mutant Russian wanna-be Klingons, has a rather disjointing experience with a Pit Bull, generally clings to everything, and decides to jump start her career. Gothkitty acts as twitchy as a cat on catnip, wacks around IrishSettergirl, and goes all Madam Zaszka.

Rating: ****

Overview: Monkeyboy and the gang reunite at the ruins of the League of Nations and Commadant Cleavage (hey, Crichton said it best!) makes him an offer he can't refuse.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy explores some caves, swims with the Creature from the Black Lagoon, halucinates after Granny gives him her 'special' powder, becomes an Egyptian archeologist, halucinates somemore , loses Winona (again), smooches with Commadant Cleavage, and goes cliff diving. Tentacleboy and SpaceBanshee have a falling out over the SpaceBanshee's Incredibly Annoying People while Gothkitty has feelings (or not). PKSkeletor goes to the dogs. Commadant Cleavage bathes, tames PKSKeletor, leads on Capn Weaselboy (formerly PK Yesman), tries out her new perfume and Monkeyboy. Spacebabe is still attending the 'How to Be A PK Rebel' seminar.

Rating: ***

Overview: Monkeyboy and the Gang try to avoid the dreaded washed out look.

Career Moves: Our favourite Spaceape introduces the PKs to cliff diving and the pulse pistol shotput, must judge which is better: bug juice or boob juice, makes time and knots (though not necessarily in that order <g>) with Commadant Cleavage, decides to act out a few scenes from The Creature from the Black Lagoon with the local acting troupe, gets fashion advice from Capn Weaselboy, and finds the lost city of Atlantis. Tentacleboy tounges Monkeyboy, schemes to make some flattened PKs, and gets a goodbye kiss from SpaceBanshee, who decides to go native. Slugman learns the joys of Leviathan kamikaze and PKSkeletor gets buried in his work.

Rating: ***

Overview: Monkeyboy takes on an evil Guyver and it's henchmen.  

Career Moves: Monkeyboy explores caves (is this a motif this season?) after hurling up Grannie's treats, gets stuck in the UTs version of a LaserTag arena, looks for his lost pet Hynerian, takes a flying leap with some help from Tentacleboy, considers the merits of frying or shooting Granny, tries to introduce new aliens to the joys of Abbot & Costello, gets a show from Granny, goes toe to toe with a Guyver, tries out lava diving, and acquires himself a nice girdle of invulnerability (OK maybe more of a vest, but you get the point). Meanwhile, Slugman gets stoned, Granny reveals her previous profession as a belly dancer, Tentacleboy exhibits his skills in fighting and tounge (Back, you guttersnipes!), IrishSettergal learns a bit about Luxan gastronomy and how to blow dren up with Gothkitty. Shroomy leaves a message and DRD Napolean makes a special guest cameo appearance as the DRD 1812.

Rating: ***

Overview: Spacebabe returns with a friend and an enemy.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy welcomes back Spacebabe, gives sanctuary to PKSkeletor, shares a cerebral smoke with Harvey, gets spiked, evicts Harvey, visits the local Hammerhead's holodeck, and teaches Moya to play dead. Spacebabe returns from her seminar, models the Cher look, tries out some leather gear, rests in her own air conditioned room, acts mysterious, and decides to resume the duties of resident Raven Haired Goddess and Spacebabe. Tentacleboy and Gothkitty get to be sidekicks, Slugman juggles cooling rods, and IrishSetterGal wanders about. DRD Napolean resumes its roll as DRD 1812 and plans to sieze control of the ship.

Rating: ****

Overview: The SpaceTurkey is overrun by a giant space weed.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy decides to try his hand at being a scientist again, helps fumigate the Space Turkey, practices his Spanish, gets irritated and irradiated (y'know this is good for meat and all but I dont think its intended for use on humans), and tells the SpaceBabe to come back later. SpaceBabe decides to become a DramaQueen, confides in Gothkitty, gets overloaded in the nueral cluster, holds it steady and gets blown off by Monkeyboy. Slugman is Captain for a day, throws himself a pity party, gets choked by Pilot, and pushes a button. Gothkitty gossips. nearly gets sliced 'n' diced, and tries on some baggy pants for a new look. Tentacleboy announces he likes to shoot things (duh!), pushes the SpaceTurkey around, decides he doesn't like onions, wishes he has an inferior nose, and gets elected Captain of the ship. Irishsettergal hangs out with the Monkeyboy and then with Granny to come up with some really killer lentil soup! PKSkeletor learns just how repellant he really is. Meanwhile DRD 1812 completes his take over of the DRDs and plots the overthrow of their biological oppressors (except John, 'cause he plays with them).

Rating: **

Overview:   Gothkitty and the SpaceApe decide to play with magic play-doh and get more than they bargained for.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy and Gothkitty VR trip goes awry during which Monkeyboy renews his SCA membership with a little sword play and armor, tries out being Arthur: King of the Britains, reveals his secret desire to be Max Headroom, meets Lightbulb-dude and his new 'doo, meets the new and improved "Super Sized" Zhaan, the ever hungry Cannibal Tentacleboy, the new DemonicCrais, SouthernBelle Blonde Spacebabe, Sir Rygel the Black of the Flaming Posterior (Flame on!), tangles with UberScorpy and discovers Harvey got a new job as a Butler. Gothkitty decides to join the SCA and kicks virtual butt. Later on the Space Turkey, Grandma and Monkeyboy share some thoughts on the virtues of the Second Amendment and their love lives.
     The rest of the crew enjoy the day off and IrishSetterGal plays chess with PKSkeletor.

Rating: ****

Overview: PKSkeletor and Monkeyboy play Hide and Seek with the dreaded glowing eyed aliens.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy shows off his kamikaze technique to Grandma in exchange for her nose candy, gets some duct work done, bonds with PKSkeletor while seering and skewering the evil aliens of the week and showing off his BAG skills, snorts some more, conspires with 1812 to take over the ship, rescues his personal action figures, and dons the Amazing Guantlets of Doom (insert TM here), and plays shrinky dink with a Scarran cockroach. Meanwhile Captain Wiggles (as we lovingly refer to Tentacleboy now), Spacebabe, Slugman, Gothkitty, and Irishsettergal get canned. Captain Wiggles continues to show just how talented his tongue really is, Gothkitty gets a blinding headache, and Spacebabe goes out for a joy ride with 1812 while Granny naps outside for a spell.

Rating: ****

Overview: The crew visit Tormented Space's equivalent of Scottland.  

Career Moves: Monkeyboy gets to play diplomat, practice his Scottish brogue (as opposed to his Spanish; no mas, no mas), clomps through the woods playing hide and seek with Space Babe, and meets Puck. The Spaceape and Spacebabe take a walk through the woods sharing Skeeter bites and avoiding the West Nile Virus from 'Bee-in-the-bonnet' Alien after Spacebabe goes on a shooting spree, end up exchanging pulse blasts and finger tips. Meanwhile Captain Wiggles has to deal with Gothkitty and Irishsettergal getting "friendly" with the locals, avoid starting a war, gets heartburn from Spacebabe, and gets to wack on Monkeyboy like a sissy. The SpaceTurkey sleeps while Slugman, Granny, and PKSkeletor hold a Why The Rest of The Crew Hates Me seminar.

Rating: ***

Overview:   The Crew of the SpaceTurkey screw up a clam bake.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy gets the wrong end of a cattleprod, eats infected Alpo-flavored gummy worms (yum!), gastrointestinally hooks up with Irishsettergirl, hates Cap'n Wiggles and avoids him when he's in "that mood", looks into the field of physician's assistant, gets in touch with his feminine side, get hit on, hits back, models the latest clubbin' wear and accessory pulse pistols, and then has a round of Urine d'Shamu (aka Sikozu-saki). Cap'n Wiggles loses a bet, hooks up with Grandma, sharing an 'experience', a drink, and a nap with her. Spacebabe and Slugman share food and gas before Spacebabe and Irishsettergirl decide go meet the local revolutionaries, get tied up for their troubles, and Irishsettergirl decides to not get the planet's version of a manicure. Slugman looks into becoming a doctor before deciding his real passion is modelling Hynerian female club wear and baking clams. Gothkitty makes a friend. Meanwhile, PKSkeletor snaps a local rentacops neck and decides to invoke the All Mighty Mussel.

Rating: *

Overview:  Monkeyboy faces the music and takes a trip to alternate universe fanfictions.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy dances with wormholes, gets grilled on his laka use, goes wormhole surfing, discusses the Unified Theorem with the Ancients, reveals his lack of artistic ability and proper use of a comma, and visits a few alternate realities. Meanwhile Spacebabe continues her ESL self study course and shares a view with Gothkitty while Capn Wiggles offers some advice and criticism to Monkeyboy and Grandma.

Rating: ***

Overview:  Monkeyboy and the gang go slumming on Earth in 1985.

Career Moves:  Monkeyboy visits the old homestead, drinks some milk, gets some chocolate, pretends to be a long lost cousin (Fred Scarran) and a leather clad angel (John Clarence), gets to be a ghost for Halloween, gives himself some advice to stop PopsCrichton from going up in flames, and generally saves the space-time continuum for completely disintegrating into chaos. (OK, maybe not.) Spacebabe shows her wormhole piloting skills, watches the tube, decides to try out the Cher look, hangs with the crew, and supports Monkeyboy. Tentacleboy 'greets' the local cops and neighbors, learns how to drive, tries his hands at arson, and gets a few licks in. Gothkitty gets colored, jams with Junior Monkeyboy with the usual assortment of sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll. Grannie fits right at home as the resident witch and soup preparer. Slugman discovers his cousin's secret: he's Kermit the Frog; steals candy from babies, carves some pumpkins, and becomes a sugar junkie.

Commadant Cleavage and Captain Weaselboy pay a a visit to Shroomy and the Space Turkey. Weaselboy and PKSkeletor have a reunion while Irishsettergal visits the sauna.
Mulder and Scully also show up.

Rating: ****

Overview:  Monkeyboy and the gang take a vacation to Monkeyboyland (aka Earth).

Career Moves:  Spaceape introduces aliens to Monkeyboyland, hangs with the Men In Black, argues with Pops, smooches Blondtralk #4, plays interstellar diplomat, beholds the power of chakon oil, gets angsty with SpaceBabe, gets knocked around by a giant two-legged Komodo Dragon, has a Merry Frelling Christmas with SpaceBabe, and goes off on a Mission From God (sunglasses included). Meanwhile, the Aliens lounge, shop, eat, shop, party, shop: Granny and Slugman enjoy the local cuisine including Cop Porn, sing Christmas carols UT style. SpaceBabe hangs with Monkeygirl (Spaceape's sis), tries on some new duds, plays taxi service to Pops, tries to relieve some pressure, hunts Komodo Dragon, and discovers the secret of Spaceape's bug juice. PKSkeletor (I really need to get this guy a new nick) hangs out at the mouth of the wormhole in his suicide pod while Capn Weaselboy tries out being a radio receiver.

Rating: ****

Overview:  Gothkitty gets a new pet, fun times ensue.

Career Moves:   Monkeyboy is confronted about Granny's Faerie Dust, helps Gothkitty get a new friend (SpideLady), tries Positive Reinforcement Therapy on the crew, encourages Gothkitty to bathe, takes a nap with SpaceBabe, gets bit by SpiderLady, decides to giveup before being convinced by Granny to go freaky-soider hunting, tries Green Spider Guts brand mousse in his hair, and gets to smooch SpaceBabe. SpaceBabe tries out being a PK again, falls apart, and exchanges words, hands, secrets, and tongues with Monkeyboy. Capn Wiggles gets angry (nothing new there), gets no respect, invokes his Zhaan filter, cops a Gothkitty feel, doesn't see the point, and tells SpaceBabe to chill. Gothkitty gets a new special friend, gets all tralky with SpaceBabe, Monkeyboy and PKPleatherDragon (aka PKSkeletor), and loses her mojo. Slugman and Granny become the Dynamic Duo of Tormented Space negotiating before splitting off for Rygel to persue an exciting career in forgery and philanthropy, and Granny to dust Scorpy, play Healer, get rejected, and make a killer Baked Spider Soup. PKPleatherDragon learns he's just a Lounge Lizard at War and IrishSetterGal plays the role of dismembered crewmember.

Rating: ***

Overview:  PKPleatherDragon takes the boys to camp.

Career Moves:  Monkeyboy gets dragged away from SpaceBabe to go to boot camp with PKPleatherDragon, Capn Wiggles, and Slugman while the girls are off to visit a Space Turkey botique. Monkeyboy wears spiffy blue PJs, fails mental training from Mrs. Crabapple, discusses pain, gets locked in a sauna, whistles a happy tune, and plays with goo. Capn Wiggles gets emotional, smacks around PKBrother-in-Law (sounds like a normal family to me), plays in the glittery Polyhedron of Doom(TM), talks with his dead wife, masters himself, and becomes enlightened (not that enlightened, he's up to 40 watts). Meanwhile, Slugman becomes a family counselor to Capn Wiggles after mentally thrashing a RabidCarrot (aka Charrid, which aren't exactly the intelectual elite of the UTs after all) and PKPleatherDragon talks to Sensei BumpyHead.

Rating: ***

Overview:  SpaceBabe takes the girls to visit a Space Turkey beautique.

Career Moves:  While the boys bond over soup, the jirls interrupt a 'Get to Know Your Enemy' conference. SpaceBabe guards the Golden Egg, tries the pulse pistol approach to diplomacy, hides, spies, and shares armor with IrishSetterGal, gets some quality killing in, rescues Commadant Cleavage and Capn Weasel, and then looks into careers as professional one-girl army, goes Terminator and loses her head to Monkeyboy. Gothkitty shares some tongue, decides to go for a new look (literally) with Granny, gets handled by Capn Weasel, gets tied up, and then sniffed at by Tentacleboy. (In otherwords, a normal Gothkitty day.) Irishsettergal plays the role of negotiator and Rabid Carrot, while Granny goes in for a facelift and creates some more of her infamous dust. Meanwhile Commadant Cleavage and Capn Weasel meet up with the Lizard Queen and her minions.

Rating: ****

Overview:  Monkeyboy watches the tube.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy laments his lost love by watching the tube, tries to remember where he heard of "Katratzi" (you know the stripper bar in down town Tehran <g>), tries convince Shroomy and the phobic SpaceTurkey to return to the Blue Twister, has a flash of insight, and makes a deal with Satan's resident minion, PKPleatherDragon, to mass produce Scarran skin boots. Gothkitty and Capn Wiggles try to stop Monkeyboy from turning into a couch potato and realize along with Slugman that humans are ignorant savages (duh!). IrishSetterGal looks for Katratzi. Meanwhile, SpaceBabe is on her way to the Spa.

Rating: ***

Overview:  Spacebabe talks to The Powers That Be while Monkeyboy goes wormhole surfing with PKPleatherDragon.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy becomes bloodbrothers with PKPleatherDragon, goes wormhole surfing, turns his module into a tilt-a-whirl, visits another reality, agrees with PKPleatherDragon not to like how each other works, and discovers where SpaceBabe's vacation spot is. Meanwhile, SpaceBabe talks to the gods, partakes in the Lizard People's Sauna, Massage and Torture package, snaps a neck, and is ready to make a deal. Capn Wiggles, Gothkitty, Slugman, IrishSetterGal, and Granny decide to stay home with Shroomy and the SpaceTurkey and reinstate democracy.

Rating: *****

Overview:  The crew infilitrate DS9 to rescue SpaceBabe from overamped obstetricians.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy becomes Peacekeeper for a day, aims lower, doesn't do aliens (heh), gets a Scarran facial treatment, goes Rambo, rescues and then naps with SpaceBabe, and learns Harvey's been squatting in his mind. SpaceBabe has a bad day: juiced up, hallucinating, and then nearly given a Cesarean; before napping with her favorite SpaceApe. Grandma resumes her role as a healer and starts a plague (like that's a big stretch from her cooking, eh?). Slugman fakes an illness to take advantage of the free medical care and then opts for Grandma's peel regimin. IrishSetterGal returns to a kennel of her fellow pups, blows a fuse, and gets a hot hand. Capn Wiggles gets to play the role of Grandma's aide, pilot, bodyguard, and superlative lover; as well as zaps hapless IrishSetterDude while Gothkitty hangs with the IrishSetter people, gets caught by Rabid Carrots who volunteer her as a surrogate mother. PKPleatherDragon gets to be Captain for a day, aims too high, and spews.

Rating: ****

Overview:  Monkeyboy and the Gang visit the United Nations Security Council.

Career Moves: Monkeyboy becomes Radioactiveman with his baby port-a-nuke, promotes Yankee capitalism by announcing a K-Mart Blue Light Special, dances with SpaceBabe before playing Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and getting punted by the local lackeys, hangs with the Lizard King, admires the Stanley plant, revels in being the insane omnipotent being, and generally causes mischief and mayhem. SpaceBabe gets smug, makes snarky fashion statements, enjoys the insanity and Monkeyboy, and gets to act like the superior RHG she is. IrishSetterGal, Slugman, and Capn Wiggles stirs up trouble with the local Rabid Carrots and IrishSetterPeople, while PKPleatherDragon spends some time in the Scarrans version of a tanning booth (which explains why they're so pale).

Rating: *****

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